Category Archives: Celebrities

Brandgelina, separation, divorce and forming new patterns.

couplesBrad Pitt and Angelina Jolie may be getting a divorce. I am sad about that. The dream couple and family. I think that is sad.

I often talk about warning signs with my clients.

In show-business, it often does not pay to make films together especially if the movie they are in is about a relationship. No matter how far apart a relationship may be from their own, it is inevitable for their own relationship to seep into a film and vice versa. Relationships that lasted a long time in the industry did so when they were not in the same business.

Children: No matter how much money a person has – time is at a premium and children will take time away from the couple. If both have busy careers, it is best to have fewer children.

Their parent’s history: Did their parents have a happy marriage? Did they ever divorce?

What is their relationship with their parents now? How are they with their parents? With others?

What is their history? Did they have a happy childhood? How did they spend their time?

People often bring their own past with them into their intimate relationships. If it was bad, when stressed this will come out and haunt them even more unless they have done some work to look into it.

At the first level, (once we have grown up and left home) we have a relationship with ourselves. At the second level we have a relationship with our significant other. How we are with ourselves, we also are with others.

When in love and or lust, when we meet someone we like, the chemicals overflow and our brains and minds just drown in it. We are unable to think clearly. It is at this time we usually ignore the warning signs. In time reality can set in, and the person we think was right at first, may not be right. Some can tell if a person is right for them on first meeting them. But usually, we need some time to find this out.

In my work with clients, I help them figure out the relationship they have with themselves, then to next work out their relationships with others. From then on, we look to make new patterns. This will take time. It has taken us a life-time to make the patterns that we use now. In a much shorter time, we can change them and set new ones.

We are complicated as individuals and as a couple we become something even more complicated. Before getting into a relationship – start to notice the warning signs. Don’t ignore them……

I am still sad though….and wish warning signs did not exist….

©2016 Yasmin

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Filed under Celebrities, Patterns, Relationship, Relationship Patterns, Thinking Patterns

Plebgate: going past our own personal plebgates……

Plebgate and the edge

Plebgate and the edge

I don’t know about you but have you noticed how it is very hard to sue and win in an action for libel or slander? And if you win you also lose too? and then costs that are awarded can be so paltry it would have been best to ignore it.

Why do you think that is?

It seems an unwinnable thing really. Today the former government chief whip Andrew Mitchell lost his High Court libel action over the “Plebgate” incident.

What is a pleb? A Pleb (from the Oxford English Dictionary) is a mid 17th century word: originally as plural plebs, from the Latin plebs ‘the common people’.

Whether he called the policemen “plebs” or not in the long run is not the real issue I am looking at here. Why has it been taken further? Do you remember taking something beyond the edge – when it really was time to stop? I think we all have done that. Just in this case all the lawyers won and now it really looks like he did say that. If Andrew Mitchell had not taken it further it could be ascribed to a misunderstanding – now though…..Giving his ruling, Mr Justice Mitting said: “For the reasons given I am satisfied at least on the balance of probabilities that Mr Mitchell did speak the words alleged or something so close to them as to amount to the same including the politically toxic word pleb.”

Sometimes don’t we all wish we could turn back time…..this must be one of them…..and make sure we don’t have our own costly “plebgate” errors in future. …..

©2014 Yasmin

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“The biggest devil is me. I’m either my best friend or my worst enemy,” Whitney had said. We all need to make friends with our inner-devil.

I was so sad to hear of Whitney Houston’s demise. I would love to see people who are talented but are also addicted to drugs, living a long and productive life, but that rarely is the case.  It would be nice to beat the odds.  What was noticeable was Whitney having said that she is “the biggest devil is me, I am either my best friend or my own worst enemy”.  There are rumours that her former marriage had rumblings of domestic abuse. Her past seems to suggest the pain she was trying to run away from. If you have pain,  it is so important to try and face your own pain.  Many people who take drugs and/or who are involving their time in unhealthy behaviours are doing just that, masking their pain, allaying their ‘enemy’. Continue reading

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Filed under Abuse, Addiction, Addiction Patterns, Celebrities, Depression

Fred Goodwin and his fall from Grace; what shall we do with our own falls?

I was just reading about Fred Goodwin’s Knighthood. It is not withdrawn or taken away. A knighthood is stripped. It sounds like slowly ripping off masking tape, bit by bit from raw skin.  His career was one of an exceptional rise and fall. He was like Moses to his staff and had, I still think still has such power. Some people really seem to be born with it. The point of this post really is to write about the falls from grace we can have. We all have them. Every one of us has had a fall or some sort.

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Filed under Celebrities, Patterns, Politics

Amy Winehouse and Why Rehab needs to be Really Really Tough

Amy Winehouse

I read the sad news about Amy Winehouse’s death this week. I have felt the pain of working with people who live as addicts and those who love them too.

It is so unfortunate and in the life of someone with an addiction there is always the positive going on. The belief that things will be allright. Often permission giving messages are going on. Thoughts such as “I will be OK”, “Just this one time”, “I’ll stop tomorrow”, “I am in control of it and not it in control of me”, “It helps me create”. These messages and more keep going on. Then there are those who are around them who also unwittingly enable the addiction to continue. Addicts are like children who really want to have their next fix. The brain has surrendered to the substance. Continue reading

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Columbo and ‘one more thing’ about Disability and Strength

It was with sadness I read as to how Columbo died this week. Peter Falk was often known as the actor who played Columbo and the catch-phrase ‘one more thing’ came up often in his series.He was by now 83 years old and had lived a long and eventful life. I suppose I was sad I never got to meet him. Was there a Columbo fan club? Why had I never set out to meet him? I realised it was because I had at some level assumed he would live forever. TV characters often seem to do that. Continue reading

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Filed under Celebrities, News, Positive

Marie Osmond, Child Depression and Suicide.

Marie Osmond at the Flamingo in Las Vegas.

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Filed under Celebrities, Depression, Psychology, Suicide