Category Archives: Uncategorized

Returns and Choice

I went to one of the well known furniture superstores the other week. There was a section called “Returns”. It seems you can return things if they have been unopened and unused if they are returned within 90 days with your till receipt. Some people use returns in stores after using the item. Some businesses such as those for photographic shoots depend upon this returns policy as it would cost too much to buy the item outright for only one shoot.

I was wondering if there was something you could return what would it be?

Would it be your partner/spouse? Your pet? Your children? Your life up to now/a certain age?

Continue reading

1 Comment

Filed under Positive, Suicide, Uncategorized

Getting Close without getting lost in a committed relationship?

I have invited Mara Fisher of http://www.BridgeofLife.com from the US to guest blog on my blog for your pleasure: below is a blog piece…Mara is a very experienced and wise therapist..

Getting close without getting lost while in a committed relationship?

Ever wonder how to know if you are being intrusive? It is much easier to get when someone else is being intrusive. Sometimes that can be confusing as well.

When we are in a committed relationship our confusion with boundaries becomes most evident. It can be quite confusing. Is it okay if I tell my partner what I think? Will I be invading their space? How come I get upset when my partner tells me what he/she thinks? If I want something done a certain way am I invading my partners boundaries. These questions can go on and on. Understanding our own boundaries is quite complex and worth the effort.

I have noticed that all working relationships have some degree of haze surrounding the boundaries of the persons within it. Relationships are alive and the people in them often overlap in order to achieve comfortable levels of intimacy. Relationships take on a life of their own separate and apart from the I or the you.

The question many of us ask, is how can I tell if I am getting lost within the life of my relationship? And yet some of us do keep our sense of self and do not get lost in the forest of our relationship. While others forget to leave breadcrumbs when they go into a relationship and so they get lost. Continue reading

Leave a comment

Filed under Relationship, Uncategorized

NEW YEARS reSOLUTIONS

Funny thing resolutions; they often get forgotten and then seem to be recycled and used again and again, year after year.  It is almost as if resolutions are eco-friendly and have a “Do not dispose of “ sticker on them.  What I am going to suggest is that we have not a resolution but to have a “solution”.  It is about time to have some changes set in place in our lives.  After all, the human race is meant to be an intelligent people.  IQ scores have risen over the last two decades.  People are meant to be smarter but a new years resolution does not seem to have much staying power.  Here therefore is what I propose for your New Years Solutions.

Continue reading

1 Comment

Filed under News, Positive, Thinking Patterns, Uncategorized

Depression, Suicide, Gary Speed and Football.

I was saddened to hear today of a suicide by a football manager named Gary Speed.  Gary Speed had the looks, the money, the life and was fit and healthy. Many are left surprised as to how he could have killed himself. Football is often called “The Beautiful Game” and I know many who love the game so much they will watch every match they can. I have many nephews who ardently follow their favourite teams, know so much about what is going on in football, scream at matches and dress up excitedly to see a match in their teams colours.

Gary Speed was 42 years of age, had two children and was married. He was doing well and had also been a successful footballer for Wales. Many of the comments being made in the press and on the news was as to how;  it was unexpected, he seemed happy, and it seemed to be impossible to have imagined the man who had everything to have ever committed suicide.

Continue reading

2 Comments

November 28, 2011 · 11:56 am

Looking at Positive Reactions to the Riots

There were some positive reactions to the riots by those who were involved and affected by them. These are behaviours and thoughts we can all learn from.

http://www.guardian.co.uk/uk/2011/aug/10/london-riots-youtube-victim-malaysian. A young man named Asyraf Haziq from Malaysia who had been mugged twice. The first time he had been knocked off his bicycle and had it stolen. His jaw had been broken by the punch. He then sat dazed on the pavement. In the video you can see him being brought to his feet and in a display that sinks so low, those ‘good samaritans’ hang about to mug him (his second time experience of being mugged in such a short space of time) of the contents of his back-pack.

It was his reaction that was interesting. He was not angry, nor did he feel aggrieved. His ‘explanatory style’ was far more positive. He had said after the double mugging how he was sorry for the muggers and had been surprised as to how young they were. He seemed to be genuinely sorry for the people that mugged him. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1FGfZ2ommI0  A positive explanatory style has more positive outcomes for recovery in terms of mental and physical health. Continue reading

Leave a comment

Filed under Positive, Psychology, Thinking Patterns, Uncategorized

Money, Bernie Madoff, his son, suicide and depression.

It was with sadness I read of the suicide of Bernie Madoff’s son, Mark Madoff over the week-end. I have no idea as to how much he may or may not have been involved in the ponzi scheme which his father ran and which fraudalently stole a reputed 50 billion dollars; from large institutions to small investors.  There were many celebrities, reputedly even Kevin Bacon and his wife who lost all the millions they invested bar the house they were living in.  A few others who were the victims of his fraud have also reputedly also commited suicide. Money, loss and its after-effects does seem to bring repercussions. Continue reading

1 Comment

Filed under Depression, Depression Patterns, Money, Suicide, Uncategorized